I went to a bar today and the bartender stared at my id for a good 6mins…
If you’re gonna be such a hard ass at least learn how to do mental math or better yet have one of those IF YOU WERE BORN AFTER THE YEAR ____ YOU CAN NOT DRINK signs bodegas have for cigarettes to help you out.
but holy fuck please do not spend 20mins checking everyone’s id.
best part was that there was a minor in the group and he didn’t even notice..
Nicole Richie taught me how to be a friend
YAAAAASSSSS NICOLE DRAG HA!
I’m just realizing that when strangers say my boyfriend and I are a cute couple it’s probably because we’re both short
Shopping with with an Italian man is like shopping with 10 teenage girls.
My Saturday nights just get crazier and crazier
"Minor in Italian" they said, "it’ll be fun" they said
If you ever meet an Italian (who only speaks italian) ask them to say ‘Pawn Stars’
Once you smoke Camels you never go back
Dascha Polanco at the Tracy Reese Fashion Show during Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week Spring 2015
Page 1 of 1319